[0.0s] previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons.
[31.0s] I wasn't trying to do anything against the cult. I lost my mask. And I was trying to find it with the Divination Pool.
[39.0s] Did you get to ask the Divination Pool?
[41.0s] The Cult of the Dragon has it. And if I go back, I'm pretty much dead. I will help you wherever I can.
[47.0s] Francis yells, oh, we're just about here. Oh, the city of Waterdeep itself. It looks fine.
[53.0s] The walls look like they've taken some damage around the city. There's scorched earth all along the outside.
[59.0s] Francis lands the airship. You bring Varam to the prison, and he takes you up to go see Leosan.
[66.0s] My goodness, it's been so long since we've seen you. You went right to get Varam. Oh, that's wonderful news.
[71.0s] Been disgruntled with his former employer.
[73.0s] We shall have him interrogated. The council meets in a few days, and they would bid you to join them.
[79.0s] Yeah, I think we could use a little bit of a break.
[83.0s] Accommodations would be nice.
[84.0s] Yes, yes. We'll get you the finest accommodations where you can rest, and then we will see you again in a few days.
[88.0s] Hey, uh, it's the winter solstice celebration. Maybe we could, uh...
[92.0s] Got plans. Sorry to slam my door.
[94.0s] Have dinner at my...
[96.0s] I shoot him a thumbs up. I'll be there.
[98.0s] You guys all separately get back to your apartments, and it's the next day.
[102.0s] And you, uh, you hear Francis yell down the hall, dinner's getting ready down here.
[108.0s] We're all discussing, you know, things that have gone on and telling stories, and you all begin to feel a little funny.
[116.0s] And you look to Francis, and he says, oh, hold on.
[119.0s] He comes out with a big, dusty, old book.
[123.0s] He's shrinking in size, but so are you.
[126.0s] And you guys shrink down to the size of a thumb, and you are quickly surrounded by two or three dozen tiny, very colorful frog-like people.
[138.0s] And they're screaming, for the Sark!
[142.0s] Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons. We are a fifth edition actual play podcast.
[146.0s] I'm your dungeon master, Russ More, and staring at me awkwardly is my wife, Amy More.
[152.0s] Yeah, I am.
[153.0s] And also with me today, Carla Johnson.
[155.0s] Not staring at you awkwardly. Or am I?
[159.0s] You might be. We don't have the video feed.
[161.0s] I'm not. I'm not.
[162.0s] And with us today, and not feeling great, but loving those hot toddies, is Tom Laird.
[168.0s] Yes, I'm under the weather.
[172.0s] And that's all the witty banter we get tonight.
[174.0s] We did great, you guys. That was super.
[177.0s] I do have a quick question before we get underway.
[180.0s] Yep.
[181.0s] How's our aggressive rebrand to Dumbgeons and Dragons going?
[185.0s] Shut the fuck up, Tom.
[187.0s] He has a hot toddy. He thinks he's hot shit now.
[190.0s] He's all drunk and aggressive.
[193.0s] He's all fired up.
[196.0s] Ready to start some shit.
[198.0s] Stirring the pot over here.
[201.0s] I still, and I know that the playback is Dumbgeons and Dragons, but I still, I'm going to just hold to it.
[208.0s] No, I was saying Dungeons.
[210.0s] It's a hard thing for me to say, just in general.
[213.0s] Dungeons does not roll off the tongue.
[215.0s] And any time that, you know what, when we end up on Good Mythical Morning one day,
[220.0s] because it's going to happen in the future.
[222.0s] Shooting high. I didn't know this. OK, good.
[224.0s] I cannot be the one to be like, hey, we're from Dumbgeons and Dragons,
[227.0s] because we're going to have to do like seven takes.
[229.0s] Pretty sure they do edits too, so it's probably fine.
[231.0s] Well, and you just nailed it right then, Amy.
[233.0s] Yeah, like a hundred percent.
[235.0s] Because I wasn't being stared down by Rhett and Link.
[238.0s] I was thinking about it so hard.
[240.0s] Who do you play, Amy?
[242.0s] You, like a fiddle.
[244.0s] Oh.
[245.0s] Amy, now he's going to try and kill you in the episode.
[248.0s] He does that every single episode, you guys.
[251.0s] Have you not noticed this? Rhett is trying to off me.
[254.0s] I have some guest stars lined up in the wings just in case.
[257.0s] Just in case.
[259.0s] He's been approached.
[261.0s] I am the name that you said I was before.
[264.0s] I play Thea Amastasia, a elf druid.
[268.0s] A druid elf?
[269.0s] What level are you?
[271.0s] Oh, of the highest.
[273.0s] She looks toward her.
[276.0s] She means ten. By that she means ten.
[278.0s] You know what, I was going to say ten. I felt like it was ten.
[280.0s] Well, you just leveled up, so this is a new thing.
[282.0s] Yes.
[283.0s] New-ish thing for you, right?
[284.0s] Level ten.
[286.0s] And Carla, who do you play and what level are you?
[289.0s] I mean, you're all level ten.
[291.0s] Yeah, I feel like you're really...
[293.0s] It's a much easier question for me to answer now.
[295.0s] I feel like they got the answers to the quiz.
[299.0s] I am new Laura Moonbrook, also level ten.
[304.0s] What other kind of skill testing questions you got?
[306.0s] I'm ready.
[307.0s] What are you?
[308.0s] What's your race and class?
[310.0s] Just kidding. I'm a human ranger.
[313.0s] And Tom Laird, who do you play?
[315.0s] I play Flink Firebeard, a mountain dwarf champion soldier.
[321.0s] Also level ten.
[322.0s] Only reason I ask is because this episode is our one-year anniversary episode.
[327.0s] What?
[329.0s] So I felt like it was a good time just to hit that who we are on the ol' noggin there.
[336.0s] Like where we came from, where we started.
[339.0s] You should have clips in of just us going, I can't remember how to play.
[344.0s] I wouldn't have to go back far. That was from last week.
[347.0s] I'm pretty sure that will come up in the episode.
[350.0s] That was to make sure we know our names one year into recording this podcast.
[357.0s] Two years into playing this same game.
[360.0s] I think we're almost three years into playing these characters.
[364.0s] I imagine us from even just a year ago, like when I think back,
[368.0s] like we're all dorky teenagers with braces and we're sitting around just being like,
[372.0s] yeah, so I'm going to use my spells and I'm going to do...
[376.0s] I love everything about this.
[378.0s] Me too.
[379.0s] I'm going to show my, my, my flaming sphere at him.
[383.0s] And that's how I imagine...
[384.0s] Why can't that be Thea's character voice?
[391.0s] Because too many of our listeners would just fall madly in love with me and have stalkers.
[396.0s] It'd be this big problem.
[399.0s] I mean, you'd have to really just stay off of Twitter all the time.
[403.0s] Done.
[405.0s] As a preventative measure.
[407.0s] Something that we didn't do this time last year and that we're doing now is we are on Patreon.
[414.0s] And Patreon is a way that you can support the creators who you enjoy the stuff that they're putting out.
[421.0s] And on Patreon, if you are a patron of us, you could get a special episode shout out,
[428.0s] like our special random patron of the episode, Kyle.
[432.0s] Thanks, Kyle.
[433.0s] All right, out.
[434.0s] We're going to play D&D.
[435.0s] You guys got shrunk down and Grancis was like, oh boy.
[440.0s] And his voice is getting higher and higher, which I'll pitch up in post as he shrinks.
[446.0s] But the book that he's holding does not shrink.
[448.0s] So he throws it in front of him, obviously.
[450.0s] So he does not crush himself with this massive book that is growing in his hands.
[454.0s] Guys, I mix up the mashed potatoes with the shrunken stuff.
[459.0s] Oh boy.
[461.0s] I walk over and I just slap Grancis.
[463.0s] You are very small and standing on top of a chair right now.
[467.0s] I don't do that.
[469.0s] I walk to the edge and I point at him.
[471.0s] And meanwhile, a whole bunch of tiny frogs are coming out and they start by saying,
[480.0s] for the sock.
[482.0s] And after they say that a few times, they begin talking in a language that you don't understand.
[487.0s] That seems to be the only common that they that they at least right now are speaking.
[492.0s] And they surround Grancis and they are coming and they have surrounded the chairs.
[497.0s] There are a lot of them.
[498.0s] They have surrounded the chairs that you are all standing on.
[501.0s] Now, out of character, I'm I'm not really a stickler for many things,
[506.0s] but I mean, who would go to a dinner party dressed in their armor and have all their weapons?
[512.0s] What's everybody wearing?
[514.0s] Our fancy clothes.
[516.0s] Tuxedo and tits.
[518.0s] Flint. Fancy.
[520.0s] You went back and you got like dress and stuff.
[522.0s] I got dolled up, you guys.
[524.0s] Oh yeah, you made a point of saying it.
[525.0s] I believe I said I bathed.
[527.0s] So you're welcome.
[530.0s] Yeah.
[531.0s] The only weapon that was talked about in the previous episode was flame tongue.
[534.0s] So I don't know if you had that on you or if it was like off to the side.
[538.0s] I think that perhaps she did because I gave her a scabbard and I think she would probably have tried that on.
[545.0s] Right.
[546.0s] Agreed.
[547.0s] Just what a good gift.
[548.0s] Trying to like get around it.
[549.0s] I bet it was a new handle.
[551.0s] That's exactly it.
[552.0s] I was like the only person who was carrying or at least had their weapon in the room with them,
[557.0s] I think was Nulara because of all this change.
[560.0s] I gave Grants this chef's knife too.
[561.0s] Yeah, he wasn't holding it at the time though.
[563.0s] You are all without armor.
[566.0s] Just keep that in mind for your armor classes.
[569.0s] And you're all standing on top of a chair.
[573.0s] 13?
[574.0s] No, it's 10 plus your dex.
[576.0s] Okay, this seems a little conspicuous and sinister.
[582.0s] I mean, he accidentally mixes up the potatoes with the shrinking spell.
[586.0s] And then like what?
[587.0s] Were all these frogs waiting in the wings for how long to come out and start chanting about a sock?
[592.0s] Fuck this.
[593.0s] Dia bends down and like takes off one of her socks and holds it in the air.
[598.0s] And as you do that, you see grappling hooks come up and hooks themselves to the side of the chair.
[605.0s] It's about five of them per chair.
[607.0s] I throw my sock down over the edge of the chair.
[609.0s] They don't seem to stop the frogs.
[611.0s] It wasn't obviously for that sock.
[614.0s] What? Are they like the same size as us now that we're shrunk?
[620.0s] Are they still little to us?
[622.0s] They'd probably be about two feet tall.
[625.0s] I don't know if this is going to drop in.
[626.0s] Okay, I'm sorry, two feet real person tall?
[628.0s] Yeah.
[629.0s] And so how tall are we?
[630.0s] So well, so sorry, they're two feet real.
[634.0s] Okay, how am I going to describe this?
[636.0s] So if you were regular size, they would be about to look about two feet to you.
[641.0s] So if you're another big frogs.
[643.0s] No, no.
[645.0s] So you are Sophia.
[648.0s] You are what?
[649.0s] Five, ten, five, something.
[652.0s] So in regular size, so before you shrunk down, if they were, you know, equivalent to being big,
[659.0s] they would look about two feet to you.
[661.0s] So they proportionately look about two feet to you,
[664.0s] pretending that you're still five, ten, even though you're really small.
[667.0s] So you're five, five centimeters, ten millimeters tall.
[672.0s] I don't understand how metrics work.
[675.0s] Just at five centimeters or ten millimeters.
[679.0s] Those aren't, do inches, man, you know, inches.
[683.0s] I feel like this is getting overly complicated.
[685.0s] I know we're shrunk, but are they small to us or the same size?
[688.0s] Yeah, they're small to you.
[689.0s] Perfect.
[690.0s] They're about up to your, they're about up just above your knee, we'll say, where you are small.
[696.0s] Okay, perfect.
[697.0s] Thank you.
[698.0s] Oh, they shrunk with us.
[699.0s] Well, they were already shrunk.
[701.0s] They were already down there being that small.
[703.0s] So we are also like, I'm so confused, but it's fine.
[708.0s] They're still smaller than us.
[710.0s] They're still only coming up to your knee.
[712.0s] And I'm going to drop a picture.
[713.0s] Because what you're saying does not make sense.
[715.0s] Yeah, I know.
[716.0s] I haven't been having difficulty describing it.
[718.0s] That's something that.
[719.0s] Right.
[720.0s] Because if they're two feet tall to our knee when we're real life size and we shrink down to however millimeters.
[725.0s] Okay.
[726.0s] So say you're like Thumbelina now.
[728.0s] They still only come up to your knee.
[730.0s] So they're that small.
[731.0s] Okay.
[732.0s] So they weren't two feet then.
[734.0s] I see what you're saying.
[735.0s] Thank you.
[736.0s] Thank you for catching up.
[738.0s] Wait, you're not explaining it very well.
[740.0s] No, I didn't explain it very well at all.
[744.0s] This fight brought to you by marriage Skype chat.
[749.0s] I just dropped what they look like in there.
[751.0s] Oh, my God.
[752.0s] They're adorable.
[753.0s] Yeah, but they're coming for you.
[755.0s] Yeah.
[756.0s] And they're also brightly colored.
[757.0s] Watch out.
[758.0s] That means they're poisonous.
[759.0s] Oh, I've watched Animal Planet.
[762.0s] Do they have spears and stuff?
[764.0s] He's got a little bow and arrow.
[766.0s] Look at that little cutie.
[768.0s] Hey, important question.
[769.0s] Maybe we can keep one when we get bigger.
[770.0s] I have an important question.
[773.0s] Did Donnie eat any of the mashed potatoes?
[776.0s] I don't know.
[777.0s] Did Donnie eat any of the mashed potatoes?
[779.0s] I don't think we said Donnie ate any of the mashed potatoes.
[782.0s] Would Donnie have eaten the mashed potatoes?
[784.0s] Donnie's a meatasaurus.
[785.0s] That's what I was just going to say.
[786.0s] I was like, I feel he's kind of carnivorous.
[788.0s] All right.
[789.0s] Donnie didn't eat the mashed potatoes.
[790.0s] Sweet.
[791.0s] We got a giant dragon, guys.
[794.0s] I mean, he's still like pretty weak.
[798.0s] Yeah, but if we're only a few millimeters tall.
[800.0s] I'm not going to make Russ change all his stats and stuff.
[803.0s] But this can help us in a way that is not Donnie just eating all these adorable little froggies.
[813.0s] All right.
[814.0s] What are you guys doing?
[815.0s] The frogs are scaling the chairs trying to get up to you.
[818.0s] I'm going to get on Donnie.
[820.0s] And Grants, this is being led over to what appears to be a hole in the wall.
[825.0s] Oh, oh, they're so they're after Grants.
[827.0s] Well, they're after everybody.
[829.0s] That's where they're leading Grants to.
[831.0s] He's the first one they got to because he was standing up.
[834.0s] So he is on the ground.
[835.0s] Oh, I see.
[836.0s] I see.
[837.0s] That makes sense.
[838.0s] What's our seating arrangement?
[840.0s] Because I assume the other three of us are on our respective chairs.
[843.0s] I had this very specifically.
[845.0s] Because Disa came in.
[846.0s] Yeah, I feel like I was sitting beside Disa near the door.
[851.0s] Door was over here.
[853.0s] Yeah.
[854.0s] I feel like Disa and I were on one side and Nulara was right across from me and Flint
[859.0s] was kitty corner to me.
[860.0s] Oh, OK.
[861.0s] Lara, Flint and Thea.
[864.0s] Yeah.
[865.0s] OK, I'm going to say.
[866.0s] It's very weird that that like that's what I remember from.
[870.0s] I'm just going to send this to you guys quick in text here and you guys can say
[873.0s] if you agree or not.
[874.0s] Flint, are you still awake over there?
[876.0s] Oh, yeah.
[877.0s] OK, good.
[878.0s] Just checking.
[879.0s] There was a little pause there.
[881.0s] Hot toddy pause.
[883.0s] Man, I haven't had a hot toddy in like two years.
[886.0s] I could totally go for that.
[888.0s] I just sent you guys a quick image of roughly where everybody was sitting.
[893.0s] The line above Grancis is approximately the location where he's being led to by
[898.0s] the frogs right now.
[899.0s] And the upside down L in the corner is the door.
[903.0s] OK, I'm going to get on Donny because he's big now, right?
[906.0s] He can fly.
[907.0s] So I'm going to get on him and I guess I'm going to go pick up my friend Flint
[913.0s] because he's the closest to me.
[915.0s] Sure.
[916.0s] Excellent.
[917.0s] How many of these froggies are there?
[919.0s] There's a lot like there's five coming up on each chair.
[924.0s] Probably another 10 down at the bottom of each chair and then a whole cluster
[928.0s] of them around and leading Grancis back.
[931.0s] Yeah, there's a lot of frogs.
[933.0s] If I can also, I can't work out like the flight statistics of Donny, but if I can
[939.0s] if I can also pick up Thea, that'd be great.
[942.0s] I would like it if we were all together and one of us is not stranded on a chair.
[946.0s] You're like five feet apart.
[948.0s] He's just flying around a dinner table.
[951.0s] He's just basically walking to get everybody.
[954.0s] No, no, I'm in for weight because Donny's very small, right?
[957.0s] He's like the size of a cat.
[959.0s] You guys are quite literally like the size of Thumbelina right now.
[962.0s] Okay, then I'm going to pick up my friends.
[965.0s] Okay.
[966.0s] Don't forget Deesa.
[968.0s] Well, but Deesa's not going to help us fight, is she?
[971.0s] No, but we also probably, I mean, I invited her.
[975.0s] We can't just like abandon her to the frogs though.
[978.0s] It's true.
[979.0s] It's Flynn's only love interest right now who he's not interested in.
[983.0s] But the frogs are collecting the people and taking us through a hole.
[987.0s] Why would we stop and?
[989.0s] Okay, I guess this is the conversation we're having on the back of Donny right now about what we're doing.
[997.0s] Okay, let's get Deesa.
[1000.0s] Can you pick everyone up and just fly the fuck out of there?
[1003.0s] Well, that will make for a very fun session of D&D that our DM has planned.
[1009.0s] So, no, that seems mean.
[1011.0s] She's what she wants to do.
[1013.0s] Well, Deesa works in that blacksmith shop, so she's probably real strong.
[1017.0s] She can thump some mini frogs, right?
[1019.0s] I would have to think so.
[1020.0s] Okay, so let's pick her up and then fly down to, like, where they're taking Grancis.
[1029.0s] Donny walks around and picks everybody up and just as kind of the frogs are pulling up onto the chair
[1034.0s] and you fly towards Grancis as he's just ducking in and you see his head kind of poke back out
[1040.0s] and he's like, just, oh, oh, I know.
[1043.0s] I kind of know these guys, I think.
[1045.0s] Oh, don't, don't squish them.
[1048.0s] And he is in, he is in the room.
[1053.0s] Okay.
[1056.0s] Well, I guess I don't think we should squish them.
[1058.0s] I agree.
[1059.0s] They're very cute.
[1060.0s] I know.
[1062.0s] Here's a thought.
[1063.0s] Hey, frogs.
[1065.0s] What do you, what do you guys want?
[1069.0s] Worth a shot, right?
[1070.0s] You, you call down to them and they don't seem to respond in any way.
[1074.0s] They just, the frogs that got up on the chair have this look of a little bit of dejection,
[1079.0s] like, fuck, we just climbed all the way up here, that kind of look.
[1082.0s] But they're climbing back down now.
[1085.0s] And the other frogs are walking towards you,
[1088.0s] but they don't seem to acknowledge what you're saying to them.
[1093.0s] Dee throws her other sock down.
[1096.0s] Mostly so I'm not off bAlydince.
[1098.0s] Sure.
[1099.0s] It still does not stop them.
[1100.0s] So you barefoot now?
[1102.0s] I slipped my shoe off.
[1104.0s] I'm just checking.
[1105.0s] I'm a barefoot.
[1106.0s] I'm just wondering if you're John McClane in this thing.
[1108.0s] I know I'm not.
[1110.0s] You guys, I think we, I can't believe I'm the one saying this.
[1114.0s] We need to go get Grancis.
[1115.0s] Wow.
[1116.0s] Well, it is, winter solstice seems like the charitable thing to do.
[1120.0s] So I guess bring us down, Donnie.
[1125.0s] I'm going straight to hell anyway, but not for this.
[1128.0s] Okay.
[1129.0s] So Donnie will land.
[1132.0s] How big's the door?
[1133.0s] Will he be able to go in with us?
[1135.0s] No, Donnie doesn't fit in the door.
[1137.0s] It's like a mouse hole?
[1138.0s] Yeah, it's like a mouse hole.
[1141.0s] So yeah, Donnie lands down and his wings flapping kind of
[1145.0s] knock all the frogs back and they stand up and brush themselves off
[1151.0s] and continue hopping towards you now.
[1154.0s] Maybe Donnie can guard the entrance.
[1155.0s] Are they frightened of Donnie?
[1156.0s] That's what I was just going to say.
[1158.0s] Donnie is much bigger than them.
[1160.0s] Can't he just block the door?
[1162.0s] We run through the door and he blocks it.
[1165.0s] Sure.
[1166.0s] I mean, they can start attacking him.
[1168.0s] He can fly away, right?
[1169.0s] Worst case, worst case, friends.
[1171.0s] Yeah, let's go get Grancis.
[1174.0s] You land and slide down Donnie's tail through the mouse hole
[1179.0s] or the frog hole in the wall.
[1181.0s] The troupe of frog people kind of climb up to where Donnie is
[1188.0s] and Donnie needs to make a Constitution saving throw.
[1194.0s] That was an 11?
[1197.0s] For the time being, Donnie can't move.
[1202.0s] He is surrounded by largely of these green,
[1206.0s] most of them are these green frog type creatures
[1209.0s] and they climb up onto him and he finds he can't move
[1213.0s] except to climb or make standing jumps.
[1217.0s] Did they frogify him?
[1220.0s] Yeah, he can't use his wings and he can't just walk normally.
[1224.0s] He must make standing jumps or climb.
[1227.0s] And what are you guys doing?
[1229.0s] I run up to where they're pulling Grancis away
[1232.0s] and I think, give us back our Grancis!
[1235.0s] So you enter into this mouse hole
[1237.0s] and you find you're quickly surrounded by an entire civilization
[1243.0s] of these frog people living inside of this wall.
[1246.0s] It's very humid and tropical
[1249.0s] and there are vines and foliage growing all over the inside of the wall
[1254.0s] and there are pools on different, you see different levels
[1257.0s] all cascading up and through the wall.
[1260.0s] And you see the group ahead of,
[1263.0s] you've been now confronted by more of these green frog creatures
[1268.0s] and they are taking Grancis and they stop and turn
[1271.0s] and Grancis is like, oh, you got in, good, uh, hey, uh,
[1275.0s] so I lost these guys a while ago, uh, and now I found them.
[1282.0s] What do you mean you lost them?
[1284.0s] Well, when I brought them back, they were bigger.
[1287.0s] Back from where?
[1289.0s] From when I was down, down south.
[1291.0s] I was looking into a bunch of different,
[1294.0s] a bunch of different creatures and people and different species.
[1298.0s] Did you fucking shrink these frogs, Grancis?
[1301.0s] I didn't, I thought I just accidentally vaporized them,
[1304.0s] so good news, bad news, didn't vaporize them.
[1310.0s] Oh boy.
[1311.0s] Classic Grancis.
[1313.0s] I look back at Nulara and Flint,
[1316.0s] like I completely regret coming in here.
[1320.0s] But yeah, I was on an expedition and I brought them back
[1325.0s] and I didn't think that I shrunk them.
[1328.0s] I thought they just disappeared,
[1330.0s] but looks like I shrunk them and they've been living in my wall.
[1334.0s] Explains why there's some little bit of mold on the outside of the wall.
[1337.0s] It's kind of hot in here.
[1339.0s] So what, Grancis, what do you, you don't want us to squish them.
[1344.0s] What do you want us to do here?
[1346.0s] What are these creatures?
[1348.0s] Well, I think what some of the locals, they call them, they call them grungs.
[1353.0s] And I don't know if they're good or bad,
[1356.0s] but obviously they've set up kind of a cool thing going on in here
[1361.0s] and I'd like to kind of look into it a little bit more.
[1364.0s] Maybe we just let them, let them lead us to where they're going
[1368.0s] and we see, see what happens.
[1371.0s] Oh, Thea hates Grancis right now.
[1374.0s] Like he had to ruin it, didn't he?
[1377.0s] We were having such a nice winter solstice
[1381.0s] and then he just had to go and like fucking Grancis it up.
[1386.0s] I don't know what kind of sock thing they're talking about though.
[1390.0s] That seems weird.
[1391.0s] Do they seem to be like malevolent towards us
[1395.0s] or are they just letting us like follow them?
[1398.0s] I assume they're still carrying Grancis.
[1400.0s] We're just like following them or?
[1402.0s] You guys have been greeted kind of at Spear Point
[1405.0s] Grancis is being led at Spear Point
[1407.0s] and they're carrying different clubs
[1409.0s] and crossbows and spears and that sort of.
[1413.0s] This is the worst winter solstice ever.
[1415.0s] Let's just go.
[1417.0s] Maybe they'll bring us to their leader
[1419.0s] and we can talk Grancis out of this shit
[1422.0s] or murder everyone.
[1425.0s] Ooh, both are really good options.
[1428.0s] Happy winter solstice!
[1432.0s] Yeah, I don't know that we have much choice
[1434.0s] but to just like go along with it for now, right?
[1437.0s] I whisper to you, Lara,
[1439.0s] I don't have enough rope.
[1442.0s] So you're just kind of going along with it at this point?
[1445.0s] Yeah, let's see where this magical winter solstice ride ends.
[1450.0s] You are led through this microcosm of a civilization here
[1457.0s] and you are led past an area that kind of seems like
[1462.0s] it's pools of, you see in there eggs and tadpoles.
[1467.0s] It's like a hatchery area
[1469.0s] and you walk past a crude makeshift,
[1472.0s] what looks like an armory.
[1474.0s] You see a few frogs as standing as guards
[1477.0s] and they've got a whole bunch of their makeshift weapons
[1480.0s] made out of small wooden pieces and bits of metal
[1484.0s] and that sort of thing.
[1486.0s] And you are made to climb up to the next level.
[1491.0s] Can everybody make a dexterity or athletics?
[1497.0s] 18.
[1499.0s] I'll give you athletics or acrobatics,
[1501.0s] depending on which you've got better in.
[1504.0s] 11.
[1505.0s] 21.
[1506.0s] Thea has her pretty clothes on,
[1509.0s] so she's not a very dexterous or athletic at this moment.
[1514.0s] I should have asked earlier, but is Disa with you guys?
[1517.0s] Yeah, I would assume so.
[1519.0s] Yeah, sure.
[1520.0s] Yeah, Disa gets a solid 17.
[1523.0s] Thea tears into her dress and tries again.
[1525.0s] Everybody ahead of you seems to climb the mossy vines quite easily,
[1532.0s] but you slide back down and are poked by one of their spears
[1536.0s] as you land back down.
[1538.0s] Poked where?
[1539.0s] In the butt.
[1540.0s] And you take two piercing damage to your butt.
[1546.0s] To your butt.
[1547.0s] Make sure you specify that on your character sheet.
[1551.0s] Butt damage.
[1554.0s] Gotta hate that butt damage.
[1556.0s] The grung that is standing by reaches out and grabs your arm.
[1561.0s] Make a constitution saving throw.
[1565.0s] I need to not ever roll dice.
[1568.0s] This is not, this is an eight.
[1571.0s] You're being guarded by a green grung,
[1574.0s] and you are poisoned,
[1577.0s] and you can't move except to climb or make standing jumps.
[1581.0s] I don't know if I am.
[1583.0s] No, yeah, I am.
[1584.0s] Yeah, so you find your movement is restricted,
[1589.0s] except you're doing better at climbing,
[1592.0s] and you can only move by making standing jumps.
[1595.0s] All right, well, I climbed the shit out of this mossy vine.
[1598.0s] So yeah, this grung grabs you,
[1601.0s] and you find that you're doing okay climbing again,
[1604.0s] but yeah, you get to the top,
[1606.0s] and you can only move by making standing jumps.
[1609.0s] May I jump in a forward motion?
[1611.0s] Yeah.
[1612.0s] Oh, okay, fine.
[1614.0s] Hop around.
[1615.0s] So, Flint and Eularia,
[1617.0s] you turn to see Thea just hopping along like a frog.
[1621.0s] Well, that's new.
[1622.0s] No big deal, guys.
[1623.0s] It's not as bad as it looks.
[1625.0s] Though my butt hurts a little bit.
[1628.0s] This magic power came with a price,
[1634.0s] and I kind of just bound around like I'm having a good time.
[1638.0s] I had some meat before I had the mashed potatoes.
[1642.0s] As you guys are talking,
[1644.0s] Nulara, you are pushed by one of the frogs.
[1647.0s] Nulara, make a constitution saving throw.
[1649.0s] These frogs are so fucking pushy.
[1651.0s] They're so rude.
[1654.0s] 19.
[1656.0s] All right, so a blue frog pushes you,
[1659.0s] but you made the save,
[1661.0s] so you seem okay, and you continue forward.
[1665.0s] You climb up two more levels with relative ease,
[1669.0s] Thea hopping along quite jauntily,
[1673.0s] as she yells from the bathroom,
[1675.0s] and you are led into what looks like a throne chamber
[1681.0s] where you see at one end of this chamber
[1685.0s] a massive throne with a gold grung sitting on it,
[1690.0s] and he is surrounded by three orange grungs.
[1693.0s] The troop that's been leading you,
[1695.0s] they take you up,
[1697.0s] and they begin talking in a language you don't understand.
[1700.0s] And the gold grung and one of the orange grungs comes down,
[1703.0s] and the gold grung walks or hops up to Grancis
[1707.0s] and pokes him in the chest,
[1709.0s] and he makes a constitution saving throw.
[1712.0s] He is poked by the gold grung.
[1715.0s] Flint, you are poked by one of the orange grungs,
[1718.0s] kind of pushed a little bit.
[1721.0s] They're a little handsy.
[1723.0s] Clint, make a constitution saving throw.
[1725.0s] 15.
[1727.0s] Yeah, you do okay,
[1729.0s] but Grancis begins speaking grung to this gold grung,
[1732.0s] and they're talking back and forth, having a conversation.
[1735.0s] Getting their grung on.
[1737.0s] How do you guys respond to him being able to speak grung?
[1740.0s] Well, I think Thea puts two and two together.
[1742.0s] I get touched by a grung.
[1744.0s] I have to hop.
[1746.0s] He gets touched by a grung.
[1748.0s] He's got these weird powers as well.
[1750.0s] Oh, my God.
[1751.0s] I turn toward them.
[1752.0s] I think they want to turn us into grungs.
[1754.0s] I don't know that they're grungs.
[1756.0s] I think they want to turn us into weird frog things.
[1759.0s] Yeah, he told you they were grungs.
[1761.0s] I think, oh, fuck.
[1763.0s] Just use the first one that I said.
[1766.0s] All three of you are kind of pushed around by a blue grung each.
[1771.0s] There's three of them on you.
[1773.0s] All of you make a constitution saving throw again.
[1776.0s] Guys, I'm going to get more than five this time.
[1779.0s] 17.
[1780.0s] Oh, now 20.
[1782.0s] Seven.
[1784.0s] What a waste.
[1785.0s] Clint and Thea, you make your saves,
[1787.0s] but Nularaaaa, you did not.
[1789.0s] You were pushed around by this blue grung,
[1791.0s] and you find that you are only able to shout loudly.
[1795.0s] Or otherwise make a loud noise at the start
[1800.0s] and end of whenever you say something.
[1803.0s] Awesome.
[1806.0s] Fantastic.
[1808.0s] Did you read up on 12 rules for this session of D&D?
[1812.0s] No, this is Volo's guide, man.
[1814.0s] It's good stuff.
[1815.0s] This is fantastic.
[1817.0s] At the beginning and end, so loud noise.
[1820.0s] So any time you say something, you say, yep.
[1823.0s] Okay.
[1824.0s] Just want to make sure I've got my language rules ready.
[1828.0s] Also, I'm sorry, Russ,
[1830.0s] because I know you have to edit this,
[1832.0s] and it's not going to be pretty.
[1834.0s] Nularaaaa, what do you think?
[1837.0s] What?
[1839.0s] Uh, what?
[1841.0s] That was weird.
[1842.0s] We got to find out from...
[1843.0s] Grancis can talk to them now?
[1845.0s] Do you think?
[1846.0s] Grancis!
[1847.0s] Grancis looks over to you,
[1848.0s] Oh, boy.
[1849.0s] Um, so, um, I was right.
[1852.0s] These were the grungs that I accidentally shrunk.
[1856.0s] I've been talking to their head honcho here,
[1858.0s] and he seems to think that we can settle the differences
[1863.0s] of me bringing them out of the forest
[1870.0s] and into this new forest, which I think is quite nice,
[1874.0s] but he didn't seem to agree.
[1876.0s] Anyways, there's apparently also something else that I...
[1881.0s] I'm still not 100% sure what it is,
[1883.0s] but there's something else that I've been...
[1885.0s] that I gooned up, and they want us to fight it.
[1889.0s] And if we make it disappear, they will let us go.
[1894.0s] Oh, boy.
[1896.0s] I'm so unimpressed with Grancis right now.
[1898.0s] Like, I can't even...
[1899.0s] Like, I look at him, and then I'm like, I turn away.
[1901.0s] I can't even fucking look at you right now.
[1903.0s] See? I know.
[1904.0s] I...
[1906.0s] I know.
[1907.0s] I just...
[1908.0s] I just want to be friends,
[1909.0s] and I tried to make some sweet mashed potatoes,
[1912.0s] and it just...
[1913.0s] I've mixed...
[1914.0s] It's been a while since I used my spell recipe book, and...
[1918.0s] You know, you don't need that for food, Grancis.
[1921.0s] You don't need that for food.
[1923.0s] But I put all my spells...
[1925.0s] It was a different time.
[1926.0s] I put all my spells with my recipes.
[1928.0s] Shut up. What do we have to fight?
[1929.0s] I don't know.
[1931.0s] What do you guys think?
[1932.0s] I'd love some sort of weapon if we're fighting something.
[1935.0s] And he begins speaking in Grung again,
[1938.0s] and he turns back.
[1939.0s] He says, oh, yeah.
[1940.0s] They're gonna give us some weapons.
[1943.0s] We just gotta go...
[1945.0s] Gotta go fight whatever this thing is that they said it is.
[1949.0s] I raise my hand,
[1951.0s] because old habits die hard from university,
[1954.0s] where I was a scribe.
[1956.0s] Okay.
[1957.0s] I say, can I not hop?
[1959.0s] You try and take a step forward,
[1961.0s] and you find you're able to walk again.
[1963.0s] Thanks.
[1964.0s] It's killer on the calves.
[1966.0s] Y'know, Laura, should we go fight?
[1968.0s] Yeah.
[1970.0s] Let's go fight.
[1972.0s] Could I stop yelling?
[1973.0s] You find you can't stop yelling quite yet.
[1979.0s] What'd you do to Russ?
[1983.0s] He talks to the Gold Grung again,
[1986.0s] and they lead you
[1989.0s] to what looks like an open...
[1992.0s] Coliseum or arena.
[1995.0s] Oh, this is for sport, is it?
[1997.0s] And they have different weapons set up,
[2000.0s] and they push all five of you through this door,
[2003.0s] and the big gate slams shut,
[2005.0s] so everybody make a Constitution save throw.
[2007.0s] To not get hit by the gate?
[2009.0s] Uh, no, to...
[2010.0s] Two!
[2011.0s] Constitution.
[2012.0s] 22.
[2013.0s] Five!
[2015.0s] Guys, I'm nailing my rights.
[2017.0s] Totally. Yeah, me too.
[2019.0s] Yeah, that's a four.
[2022.0s] Four. Got it. Got a four.
[2024.0s] Gonna get some butt damage from that door
[2026.0s] hitting me in the butt
[2027.0s] from my way into the Coliseum.
[2029.0s] I already got butt damage.
[2030.0s] I don't want any more butt damage.
[2031.0s] So, uh,
[2033.0s] Thea, you were pushed by a Red Grung,
[2036.0s] and you must eat...
[2039.0s] You must use your action
[2041.0s] to eat food within reach.
[2043.0s] You find there are no food within reach.
[2046.0s] Nulara, you were pushed by a Purple One,
[2049.0s] and you feel a desperate need
[2052.0s] to soak yourself in liquid or mud,
[2055.0s] and you can't take actions or move
[2057.0s] except to do so,
[2059.0s] or to reach a body of liquid or mud.
[2062.0s] What is happening here?
[2064.0s] Is the Gold Grung anywhere?
[2067.0s] Uh, Grancis was pushed by an Orange Grung,
[2070.0s] and he is frightened of his allies.
[2073.0s] Well, he should be.
[2075.0s] So you were all pushed through.
[2078.0s] Uh, Thea, you get the munchies.
[2081.0s] Nulara, you look around,
[2083.0s] and you find there are definitely mud puddles
[2086.0s] all throughout this arena,
[2088.0s] and you feel the desperate need to get in there
[2092.0s] while still screaming your thoughts.
[2095.0s] And Grancis, he turns and looks at the gate,
[2099.0s] and then he looks back at you guys,
[2101.0s] and he cowers away from you
[2103.0s] as you hear the Gold Grung
[2106.0s] over what sounds like some sort of amplification device,
[2110.0s] and there are hundreds of Grungs
[2113.0s] surrounding this arena,
[2115.0s] and a gate rises at the end,
[2118.0s] and stepping out from the gate
[2121.0s] is a giant white sock dragon.
[2127.0s] And you see Grancis,
[2129.0s] and he is cowering away from you,
[2131.0s] but he says,
[2133.0s] That's my sock!
[2135.0s] Roll for initiative.
[2140.0s] Hey there!
[2141.0s] Happy New Year to you,
[2142.0s] and also happy one-year anniversary
[2144.0s] to you and us
[2146.0s] here at Dumbgeons and Dragons.
[2148.0s] One whole year!
[2150.0s] I'm your Dungeon Master, Russ More.
[2152.0s] Thank you for joining us
[2153.0s] for episode 29 of Dumbgeons and Dragons,
[2155.0s] titled A Grancis Solstice Vacation.
[2158.0s] One quick note I want to make
[2160.0s] and give credit to before carrying on here
[2162.0s] is the monster that the adventures are about to fight
[2165.0s] was homebrewed and given to us
[2167.0s] by listener of Dumbgeons and Dragons
[2169.0s] and general all-around amazing human being,
[2172.0s] Ty Zuniga, on Twitter,
[2174.0s] at the underscore fierce underscore king.
[2177.0s] Go give Ty a follow,
[2178.0s] and Ty, I had to tone down the stats a little bit
[2181.0s] on this one on the fly,
[2182.0s] because I kind of took away all of the adventures armor
[2185.0s] and really good weapons.
[2187.0s] Oops.
[2188.0s] It's still a super fun fight coming up,
[2190.0s] thanks to you.
[2191.0s] I'll put a link to Ty's original stat block
[2193.0s] in the description for all to see.
[2195.0s] This episode is released on the exact day
[2197.0s] that we went live with our first two or three episodes
[2200.0s] of the podcast last year.
[2201.0s] So as such,
[2202.0s] January 3rd is our anniversary date.
[2204.0s] We're all thrilled to have grown the community
[2206.0s] and listener base that we have over the last year,
[2208.0s] and that includes you.
[2210.0s] Not a week goes by
[2211.0s] that we don't talk about how lucky we are,
[2213.0s] not just by being able to play the game and have fun,
[2215.0s] but to have people like you listen to us
[2218.0s] and interact with us on our many various social platforms
[2222.0s] from Facebook and Twitter to Instagram and Patreon.
[2225.0s] We are always humbled by the fact
[2227.0s] that people not only listen to us,
[2229.0s] but feel that we are worth their hard-earned dollars
[2232.0s] to help bring a better podcast to you each week.
[2235.0s] So thank you.
[2236.0s] If you're new to the Dumb Dragon community,
[2238.0s] or if you've never done so before,
[2240.0s] we would greatly appreciate you dropping us
[2242.0s] a five-star rating and review on Apple Podcasts or Stitcher.
[2245.0s] It helps out a ton, absolutely.
[2247.0s] And if you want to join us anywhere we're on social media,
[2250.0s] links can be found at DumbDragons.com,
[2252.0s] or you can jump on over to Twitter
[2254.0s] and follow us at DumbDragonCast.
[2256.0s] I'm on there really pretty much all the time.
[2259.0s] Come say hi, I'm on there right now talking to someone.
[2261.0s] It's just how it works.
[2262.0s] On Facebook, we're at Facebook.com
[2264.0s] slash DumbDragonPodcast,
[2266.0s] and you can also send us an email
[2268.0s] to DumbDragonPodcast at gmail.com.
[2271.0s] All links mentioned today will be in the description below.
[2274.0s] The next episode will be out January 17th.
[2276.0s] You know, I didn't realize January is a three-episode month.
[2278.0s] I got to get to work here, geez.
[2280.0s] Let's jump back into the episode and fight a sock.
[2284.0s] Why not, right?
[2285.0s] It's a Grancis-centric storyline after all.
[2288.0s] Anything goes.
[2295.0s] Okay, so Grancis is up first.
[2297.0s] What does he do, wet himself?
[2298.0s] Yeah, he looks at you and he's like,
[2300.0s] I am, I am so sorry, guys.
[2305.0s] And then you see him kind of
[2307.0s] begin to speak this incantation
[2310.0s] and the fear leaves from his eyes.
[2314.0s] And he looks towards the dragon and says,
[2316.0s] oh, boy, I fucked up.
[2319.0s] But let's get out of this, okay?
[2321.0s] Okay?
[2322.0s] And now it is the sock's turn.
[2325.0s] Okay, and he bounds towards you
[2328.0s] because he doesn't have feet.
[2329.0s] He's just a sock.
[2334.0s] I'm sorry, this creature is a sock?
[2335.0s] And it looks like a well-used sock.
[2338.0s] It's got some stink to it.
[2339.0s] Oh.
[2340.0s] Yeah.
[2341.0s] Oh, I'm trying to paint a picture here for the people.
[2344.0s] And it's hopping through the mud to get to you.
[2347.0s] And it uses its frightful presence on you.
[2352.0s] Everybody must make a wisdom saving throw.
[2354.0s] I'm tired of rolling dice, man.
[2356.0s] This is what this game is all about.
[2357.0s] I just, I'm not doing a very good, yep, there it is.
[2362.0s] 12.
[2363.0s] 16.
[2364.0s] 13.
[2365.0s] Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute,
[2367.0s] wait a minute, wait a minute.
[2369.0s] Wait.
[2370.0s] I can reroll a wisdom save.
[2371.0s] Yeah, you can.
[2373.0s] Thank you.
[2374.0s] I look at, I look at you, Lara, and I wink.
[2377.0s] I fucking rolled a four, you guys.
[2379.0s] God damn it.
[2382.0s] So, Thea and Nulara are frightened of this,
[2388.0s] of this creature.
[2389.0s] Great.
[2390.0s] Keeping them, yep.
[2391.0s] Scared and hungry.
[2392.0s] Scared and hungry.
[2393.0s] Scared in my life.
[2394.0s] Scared and muddy.
[2396.0s] And loud.
[2399.0s] Scared, muddy, and loud.
[2400.0s] No, you find your screaming has stopped,
[2402.0s] but you still feel the need that you need to cover yourself in mud.
[2405.0s] The screaming has stopped.
[2407.0s] I mean, it's tough because I like,
[2409.0s] Nulara would also just like,
[2412.0s] this would be very embarrassing for her.
[2414.0s] She would not keep talking very much.
[2417.0s] She's a very, very quiet person, generally.
[2420.0s] Yeah.
[2421.0s] That's fair.
[2422.0s] I'm just going to quickly look up frightened here for you,
[2424.0s] just to make sure we know what that does.
[2427.0s] Just to see how frightened we are.
[2429.0s] So, a frightened creature has disadvantage on ability checks and attack rolls.
[2433.0s] While the source of its fear is within line of sight,
[2436.0s] the creature can't willingly move closer to the source of fear,
[2439.0s] and you can make a saving throw at the end of your turn to save from that.
[2443.0s] But it makes that and casts that,
[2445.0s] or it doesn't cast that, but it does that,
[2447.0s] and Thea and Nulara are frightened,
[2449.0s] and it comes forward and attacks Flint with its thread breath.
[2455.0s] I was going to say it's...
[2457.0s] No, that's a 60-foot color.
[2459.0s] Anti-wick.
[2460.0s] It attacks everybody with its thread breath.
[2464.0s] Because, yeah, that's a big, that's a 60-foot cone.
[2466.0s] Everybody's kind of clustered.
[2468.0s] So everybody make a dexterity saving throw.
[2473.0s] Oh, it's more than enough.
[2476.0s] I'm in double digits, you guys.
[2479.0s] 13 for me, Russ.
[2481.0s] 14.
[2482.0s] 15.
[2483.0s] Not that that's going to win anything.
[2485.0s] These are not...
[2486.0s] This is like the worst rolling ever.
[2487.0s] I think it's the best roll I've had, and it was 15.
[2490.0s] I had a nat 20.
[2492.0s] I guess I did roll a 19 on something totally useless.
[2497.0s] So from its sock mouth comes strands of thread as it falls over you,
[2506.0s] and everybody takes full damage, taking 34 bludgeoning damage.
[2512.0s] What the legitimate fuck?
[2514.0s] It's a sock, Russell.
[2516.0s] It's an adult sock puppet dragon.
[2519.0s] Gross.
[2520.0s] Oh my god.
[2521.0s] What the fuck does that mean?
[2522.0s] It means it's fully grown.
[2524.0s] Well, that's not what I thought it meant.
[2525.0s] In the socket.
[2526.0s] Yeah, right?
[2527.0s] It's an adult, like from an adult store for adults.
[2531.0s] What is happening?
[2533.0s] I like that Amy and I always have our minds in the gutter.
[2536.0s] I feel like...
[2537.0s] Always.
[2538.0s] I'm so glad I'm not by myself.
[2539.0s] Why do you only have 31?
[2540.0s] You should have been full.
[2541.0s] I wasn't.
[2542.0s] You should have been.
[2543.0s] Everybody should have been full.
[2544.0s] Because you've had three days of rest.
[2546.0s] Are you sure?
[2547.0s] Yeah, you had three days of rest.
[2548.0s] Okay.
[2549.0s] I had three days of rest, and then I had minus...
[2552.0s] How much did my butt hurt?
[2553.0s] 34.
[2554.0s] Oh, your butt hurt, too.
[2556.0s] 68, and then minus 30, so I'm at 38.
[2560.0s] 34.
[2561.0s] You're at 34, because you took 34.
[2564.0s] So you're at half of what...
[2566.0s] Jesus.
[2568.0s] Yeah.
[2569.0s] Now it's Nulara's turn.
[2571.0s] Okay.
[2572.0s] And you are frightened.
[2573.0s] I'm frightened.
[2574.0s] And you want to cover yourself in mud.
[2576.0s] And I'm frightened.
[2577.0s] Yeah.
[2578.0s] Sweet.
[2579.0s] The only way you can move is to move towards mud, but you can't move in the direction of
[2581.0s] the dragon.
[2582.0s] Conveniently, there's a mud puddle right behind you.
[2584.0s] Perfect.
[2585.0s] I guess I back into that mud puddle.
[2587.0s] Mm-hmm.
[2588.0s] I guess that's my first action?
[2591.0s] Or that's my action, yeah?
[2593.0s] So much to think about.
[2595.0s] Does my grung spell mean I have to stay there?
[2598.0s] Or now that I have soaked myself in mud, can I get out of that puddle?
[2602.0s] Ooh, yeah, is she satisfied?
[2604.0s] I think that's your action.
[2606.0s] Or at least one of your actions.
[2608.0s] It takes actions to move.
[2611.0s] Yeah, so once you're soaked, so for an action, you are covering yourself in mud.
[2618.0s] So you still have one more action, I believe.
[2620.0s] But I can't move towards the sock?
[2622.0s] You have to make a saving throw at the end of your turn.
[2625.0s] But she could maybe use a ranged weapon at the sock?
[2628.0s] Well, I don't have a ranged weapon.
[2630.0s] Don't I only have my sword?
[2632.0s] You only have your sword.
[2633.0s] Right.
[2634.0s] Great.
[2635.0s] I will do nothing.
[2636.0s] I will make a save to try to not have this problem my next turn.
[2641.0s] Yeah.
[2642.0s] Because I can't do any.
[2643.0s] I'm not going to throw my sword.
[2645.0s] That's about all I got.
[2646.0s] You could move further away to another mud puddle.
[2649.0s] No, that's fine.
[2650.0s] I want to fucking stab this sock when I have my faculties restored.
[2655.0s] Wisdom saving throw.
[2657.0s] Okay.
[2658.0s] Great.
[2659.0s] That won't do it.
[2660.0s] It's a 10.
[2661.0s] No, you're still frightened.
[2662.0s] Great.
[2663.0s] I'll probably also take a healing surge before your turn's over.
[2666.0s] Great.
[2667.0s] Yeah.
[2668.0s] That's what I'm going to do.
[2669.0s] Flint's looking out for my safety.
[2672.0s] Flint, you're up.
[2673.0s] On these weapon racks, you find there are various degrees of warhammer, axe, spear,
[2683.0s] ranged weapons, bows, that sort of thing.
[2686.0s] So whatever you want to grab, and I will tell you what it would equate to.
[2691.0s] Some sort of two-handed battle axe would be ideal.
[2695.0s] Sure, sure.
[2697.0s] Well, I'll give you the plus seven to hit.
[2700.0s] Okay.
[2701.0s] Just because that usually stands for proficiency and stuff.
[2706.0s] But we'll give you a 1d12 plus two on this one.
[2710.0s] All right.
[2711.0s] So half of what I normally do.
[2713.0s] Yeah.
[2715.0s] All right.
[2716.0s] I grab an axe off the rack, and I go charging over at this sock dragon.
[2720.0s] Sure.
[2721.0s] Have that, motherfucker.
[2724.0s] That's a 19.
[2726.0s] But not critical.
[2728.0s] 19 will hit.
[2729.0s] Yep.
[2730.0s] Perfect.
[2733.0s] Eight and two, that's 10 damage.
[2735.0s] It will take that 10 damage.
[2738.0s] Okay.
[2739.0s] And I will attack him again.
[2740.0s] Yep.
[2743.0s] That's another 19.
[2745.0s] And 19 will also hit.
[2748.0s] Ooh, two damage, but I get to reroll that.
[2750.0s] Ooh, yeah.
[2752.0s] Six, and what was it?
[2753.0s] Two bonus, so eight damage there.
[2755.0s] Okay.
[2756.0s] I'm going to hit myself with a healing surge real quick while we're standing around.
[2762.0s] Sure.
[2763.0s] While you're standing around fighting in a giant sock.
[2765.0s] Doing nothing.
[2766.0s] That's right.
[2767.0s] At the end of your turn, the sock puppet dragon heaves a little bit.
[2773.0s] And coming forth from its maw, quite literally, a dust bunny comes out.
[2780.0s] Aw.
[2781.0s] And it falls in the initiative order.
[2784.0s] So, Thea, you're up next.
[2786.0s] First things first.
[2791.0s] Good anticipation building.
[2793.0s] Thank you.
[2794.0s] I'm immune to poison and disease.
[2797.0s] Okay, so you shouldn't have been hopping, but you did anyways.
[2800.0s] I know, I did.
[2801.0s] But now, should I be having the munchies?
[2805.0s] No.
[2806.0s] Through their touch is poison, correct?
[2807.0s] No.
[2808.0s] Okay.
[2809.0s] Well, I hopped just for funsies because I didn't want him to feel bad about himself.
[2813.0s] But yeah, I'm not going to fucking search for food, even though I feel like Thea is probably a person who's always hungry anyway, just because of recreational activities.
[2823.0s] So, as that is happening, I know I am still frightened of this creature.
[2831.0s] So, I'm not going to move any further toward it.
[2834.0s] However, I am going to...
[2837.0s] I see it's made of fabric.
[2839.0s] I'm going to Flaming Sphear its ass.
[2842.0s] So, I make a five diameter sphere and I launch it at this motherfucker.
[2847.0s] And I'm going to use a fourth level spell slot.
[2851.0s] And that's going to do something.
[2853.0s] Something rad.
[2854.0s] The dragon does need to make a dexterity saving throw and take half damage on a successful.
[2862.0s] And then it also creates a bonus action.
[2864.0s] Well, its dex is only 12 for the save.
[2867.0s] That's not enough.
[2868.0s] But it has legendary resistance.
[2870.0s] So, if it fails a saving throw, it can choose to succeed instead, which it does.
[2875.0s] That's fine.
[2876.0s] I can take half my damage.
[2877.0s] I'm glad I chose a higher spell slot because for the damage increases by 1d6 for each slot above the second level.
[2886.0s] So, that means it's 2d6, 3d6, 4d6, 5d6 damage.
[2894.0s] And you'll take half that.
[2896.0s] 22.
[2897.0s] So, yeah, it is vulnerable to fire damage.
[2900.0s] So, it takes full fire damage.
[2902.0s] Oh, you guys.
[2904.0s] So, it takes 22 fire damage.
[2906.0s] Is it made of polyester?
[2907.0s] Does it just?
[2908.0s] It's cotton.
[2909.0s] Really?
[2910.0s] Oh, okay, well.
[2911.0s] Too bad.
[2912.0s] I know, right?
[2913.0s] Does it just go whoosh?
[2914.0s] And it was polyester and it just like that.
[2919.0s] It's not flame retardant at all.
[2922.0s] Brungs cheered.
[2923.0s] It's the dust bunny's turn and it's going to attack.
[2928.0s] Bring it.
[2929.0s] This adorable dust bunny comes up to you.
[2933.0s] And it begins jump kicking you.
[2938.0s] You take 1d6 plus one bludgeoning damage.
[2941.0s] I feel like I'm Sylvester and I've met this what I thought was a mouse, but oh my God, it's actually a kangaroo.
[2948.0s] And it's beating the shit out of me.
[2950.0s] So, you take three bludgeoning damage from this dust bunny's jump kick.
[2953.0s] I'm okay with it because it's adorable.
[2957.0s] And at the end of its turn, the dragon heaves forth two more dust bunnies and they come out.
[2967.0s] And we all make a collective aww.
[2970.0s] Yeah.
[2971.0s] It's Disa's turn.
[2972.0s] She grabs a similar war hammer to Flint and she runs over to the giant dragon and rolls very poorly.
[2979.0s] Holy shit.
[2981.0s] Does not do well.
[2984.0s] And we all yell, Disa, what the fuck?
[2986.0s] I'm speaking for a lot of us right now.
[2988.0s] I apologize.
[2989.0s] Swings wildly.
[2990.0s] She's like, sorry, guys.
[2992.0s] But it's Grants' turn and Grants stands up.
[2996.0s] And you hear him whisper an incantation.
[3000.0s] What does that sound like?
[3002.0s] Oh boy.
[3009.0s] Well, let's hold on.
[3010.0s] Let's see if he does well.
[3012.0s] He does well.
[3013.0s] He casts magical spell.
[3019.0s] Hashtag, you don't need to be a professional to be a DM.
[3023.0s] Yeah, that's right.
[3025.0s] He casts fifth level magic missile.
[3030.0s] Oh shit.
[3032.0s] So he gets to roll 8d4.
[3036.0s] Jesus.
[3037.0s] So you see him whisper this incantation.
[3040.0s] Oh boy.
[3041.0s] And these missiles, eight of them fly out from around him and strike the sock dragon.
[3049.0s] And it takes 18 force damage and it's knocked back a step.
[3055.0s] But it's its turn.
[3057.0s] And he swings his tail towards Flint and Disa because they are closest near them.
[3063.0s] And Flint towards Disa, it rolls a 12, which does not hit towards Flint.
[3071.0s] It rolls a 23, which should hit.
[3077.0s] So its tail swings forward to you and you take 15 bludgeoning damage from this tail.
[3086.0s] And those are its two actions.
[3089.0s] And now it's Nularaaaa's turn.
[3092.0s] Well, I probably just stay in the mud puddle because I can't move towards it because I'm still scared.
[3100.0s] Yeah, your mud puddle stuff, you probably just have this one more round and then your mud puddle stuff will disappear.
[3107.0s] Well, it's doing wonders for my skin.
[3109.0s] So silver lining.
[3111.0s] Yeah, I still can't really do anything.
[3114.0s] So I'm going to try again to not be frightened so I can do something.
[3119.0s] Sure.
[3120.0s] That's wisdom, yeah?
[3122.0s] Yes, wisdom saving throw, yeah.
[3124.0s] If I'm going to get so wise, get ready for it.
[3126.0s] I'm really shaking this dice good.
[3130.0s] I did get so wise, you guys.
[3132.0s] It's 19.
[3134.0s] And that will succeed.
[3135.0s] You are no longer frightened, but that is the end of your turn.
[3138.0s] Nularaaaa the wise.
[3140.0s] And at the end of your turn, the sock puppet makes another tail attack towards Flint.
[3146.0s] And that is a critical 20.
[3148.0s] Damn.
[3150.0s] Why is this guy so mean to me?
[3152.0s] You're closest to it, dude.
[3154.0s] You run in.
[3156.0s] I'm just playing the game.
[3160.0s] So that's, I rolled poorly though, so you're probably okay.
[3165.0s] Eight plus five.
[3168.0s] So that's 13 bludgeoning damage.
[3170.0s] Okay.
[3172.0s] Could have been worse.
[3173.0s] Flint, you're up.
[3174.0s] Okay, let's start swinging that axe again.
[3177.0s] How's this dragon looking, by the way?
[3179.0s] Is he looking like he's in full sock health or what's happening here?
[3182.0s] You know, he's got some frays around the edge.
[3186.0s] A couple threads are coming loose?
[3188.0s] Yep, yep.
[3190.0s] But no stuffins falling out yet.
[3194.0s] Okay.
[3196.0s] That is a 17.
[3198.0s] 17 will not hit.
[3200.0s] Oh, okay.
[3202.0s] 21.
[3204.0s] 21 will hit.
[3206.0s] Excellent.
[3208.0s] Sorry, did I just hear a 17 will not hit?
[3210.0s] It's a good thing I'm fucking using spells.
[3212.0s] That is what you heard.
[3214.0s] So that's 13 damage, Russ.
[3216.0s] Okay.
[3218.0s] And I'm going to use my action surge to attack him again.
[3220.0s] Oh, sure.
[3222.0s] It's a 19.
[3224.0s] 19 will hit.
[3226.0s] 10 damage.
[3228.0s] And I'm going to take a healing surge.
[3230.0s] Seems like a good idea.
[3232.0s] It really does.
[3234.0s] So the sock puppet lunges forward towards you, Flint.
[3240.0s] Make a dexterity saving throw.
[3242.0s] So many throws.
[3244.0s] 16.
[3246.0s] And gobbles you up.
[3248.0s] You are now inside the adult sock puppet dragon.
[3255.0s] That's exactly where I wanted to be, guys.
[3257.0s] And after being swallowed by such a dragon, you must escape out the other end.
[3263.0s] Its length is 60 feet and considered difficult terrain.
[3268.0s] If a creature ends its turn inside of the sock puppet dragon, it must take a 2d6 poison damage.
[3275.0s] Okay.
[3277.0s] Good God, man.
[3279.0s] Thea, you're up.
[3281.0s] You look forward and you see Flint just be devoured by this.
[3285.0s] Also, I am resilient versus poison, just an FYI.
[3288.0s] Yeah, no, that's cool.
[3290.0s] Russ doesn't actually mean that.
[3292.0s] He does not think that's cool.
[3294.0s] PS, you also touched the dragon.
[3296.0s] So you are susceptible to its used gym sock ability.
[3303.0s] And it reeks of body odor.
[3306.0s] So you have disadvantage on charisma checks until you clean yourself.
[3311.0s] How charismatic is he trying to be, having just come out of a sock puppet's anus?
[3316.0s] I think charisma is not an important thing at this time.
[3319.0s] I'm just trying to keep true to the character.
[3322.0s] Sweet Jesus.
[3324.0s] Okay.
[3325.0s] Flint, buddy, how many hit points you got?
[3330.0s] I'm okay for now.
[3332.0s] You're good?
[3333.0s] Okay.
[3334.0s] Because I worry anything I do to the sock puppet's going to adversely affect you.
[3338.0s] But all I have are spells.
[3341.0s] No, you go for it.
[3342.0s] So it's not like I can aim specifically for its head because you're in its gullet or something like that.
[3348.0s] It's just going to happen.
[3350.0s] It's just happening.
[3351.0s] It's all good.
[3352.0s] Okay.
[3353.0s] I'm going to gas this shit.
[3355.0s] How do I say it?
[3356.0s] Gash.
[3357.0s] Gash.
[3358.0s] I can say it however I want to.
[3361.0s] I'm going to gash all up in here.
[3365.0s] So I'm going to, I'm not going to conjure.
[3370.0s] I'm going to abjurate.
[3372.0s] I don't know.
[3373.0s] Onto this dragon.
[3374.0s] I'm going to place a magical command on him that is going to force him.
[3381.0s] Well, technically refrain him from harming anyone in our party.
[3388.0s] I assume the creature can understand me because I speak draconic.
[3394.0s] Well, it speaks common, but sure.
[3396.0s] Okay then.
[3397.0s] No excuses.
[3398.0s] It's a sock.
[3400.0s] Amy, it's a fucking sock.
[3402.0s] Obviously it speaks common.
[3404.0s] Right?
[3406.0s] Obviously.
[3408.0s] It must succeed on a wisdom saving throw or be charmed by me for the duration.
[3415.0s] Okay.
[3416.0s] It succeeds.
[3419.0s] No, it does not.
[3420.0s] Legendary resistance.
[3421.0s] It chooses to succeed.
[3422.0s] It's got three of those per day.
[3424.0s] It rolled a three, but legendary resistance says I can succeed that.
[3428.0s] Pretty sweet spell that legendary resistance.
[3431.0s] Well, I think that just cancels out my fucking spell.
[3434.0s] Yeah.
[3435.0s] So what do you scream up at it?
[3437.0s] Fuck you motherfucker.
[3438.0s] And I ram my current flaming sphere at it.
[3442.0s] Sure.
[3443.0s] It will take that.
[3444.0s] Yeah, it will.
[3446.0s] Dexterity saving throw.
[3448.0s] Yes.
[3449.0s] 18.
[3450.0s] Fine.
[3451.0s] It takes half damage.
[3452.0s] Which is full damage because it's vulnerable.
[3454.0s] Yeah, it is.
[3455.0s] Yeah, it is.
[3456.0s] And that was a level four, so that's a 5d6.
[3465.0s] 24.
[3467.0s] 24.
[3468.0s] It will take 24 damage.
[3470.0s] Yeah.
[3471.0s] And let out a sock-like bellow.
[3474.0s] That's what I imagine a sock to do.
[3478.0s] Yeah, cool.
[3481.0s] I'm really mad about that whole like the first time I try my gay ass thing and it doesn't
[3486.0s] work.
[3487.0s] I'm sorry.
[3488.0s] You tried it against a dragon.
[3491.0s] It didn't matter if it was against a...
[3493.0s] Does every dragon have that legendary thing?
[3496.0s] Yeah.
[3497.0s] Good to know.
[3498.0s] Good to know.
[3499.0s] Good to know.
[3500.0s] I did not know that.
[3501.0s] This is interesting information.
[3502.0s] We need to do more research.
[3504.0s] We are not very good players.
[3506.0s] And it heaves forth two more dust bunnies.
[3509.0s] And it is all of the dust bunnies' turn.
[3511.0s] So, there are five of them now.
[3513.0s] They rush forward.
[3514.0s] One to Grancis.
[3516.0s] One to Nularaaaa.
[3517.0s] Flint inside.
[3519.0s] One to Thea.
[3520.0s] Two to Deesa.
[3522.0s] And they kick the bejesus out of everybody.
[3529.0s] Grancis takes three bludgeoning.
[3532.0s] Nularaaaa takes...
[3534.0s] Is that bejesus?
[3535.0s] Are we calling three a bejesus now?
[3537.0s] Three bejesus.
[3538.0s] It is a unit of measurement now.
[3540.0s] It's canon.
[3541.0s] Nularaaaa, you take five bludgeoning.
[3544.0s] Thea, you take three bludgeoning.
[3546.0s] You mean a bejesus.
[3547.0s] A bejesus.
[3548.0s] And Deesa takes...
[3550.0s] Oh, jeepers.
[3552.0s] Deesa takes...
[3554.0s] That is seven...
[3555.0s] Let's see.
[3556.0s] It's 15 bludgeoning.
[3557.0s] Whoa.
[3558.0s] That sounds more like a bejesus.
[3560.0s] That does, right?
[3561.0s] Three isn't quite enough for a bejesus.
[3563.0s] Yeah.
[3564.0s] Deesa sees that Flint has been gobbled up by the dragon, and she...
[3571.0s] Is filled with a lustful rage.
[3573.0s] Is filled with a lustful rage.
[3578.0s] That's Amy's fault.
[3579.0s] Sorry, dude.
[3581.0s] And she pushes the dust bunny aside and strikes into...
[3587.0s] Strikes into the dragon for a natural 20.
[3591.0s] Yeah, she does.
[3592.0s] Deesa.
[3593.0s] Rage.
[3594.0s] It's five, 11 plus two is 13 slashing damage.
[3599.0s] I yell, you overdate now.
[3601.0s] And she cuts a hole down near the lower end of this sock.
[3606.0s] Ooh, maybe he can sneak out of there and not the anus, because I mean...
[3610.0s] You never know.
[3611.0s] Grants is his turn.
[3613.0s] So he lines himself up with three of the dust bunnies.
[3617.0s] The two on Deesa and one on himself.
[3619.0s] And he fires a hundred foot long, five foot wide lightning bolt.
[3625.0s] Nice.
[3626.0s] That he's like...
[3629.0s] Yeah, it succeeds.
[3630.0s] But he's like...
[3632.0s] God.
[3633.0s] Oh, it worked!
[3635.0s] And he casts lightning bolt that strikes through and...
[3641.0s] Puffs the three dust bunnies into nothing.
[3645.0s] And the dragon takes 8d6 lightning damage on a failed save.
[3651.0s] On a failed save.
[3653.0s] It chooses to succeed.
[3655.0s] This is its third succeed.
[3657.0s] But it will take half of 8d6 lightning damage.
[3660.0s] How many times can it use that skill, Russ?
[3662.0s] Three per day.
[3664.0s] Excellent.
[3665.0s] Okay.
[3667.0s] That's six.
[3669.0s] Deesa is slightly attracted to Grants' and feels really ashamed about it.
[3674.0s] She should, because as much as he's kind of proving himself in this fight,
[3678.0s] we would absolutely not be in this situation if he wasn't such a dolt.
[3682.0s] No, who thinks that they accidentally vaporize a species or a colony of frogs
[3691.0s] and also somehow ends up having a magical, gross, sweaty, gym sock dragon?
[3699.0s] So, yeah.
[3700.0s] Well, you never know.
[3702.0s] That's our Grants'
[3703.0s] So this dragon takes half of the damage, which is 15 total.
[3711.0s] It would have been 30 if it wasn't half.
[3713.0s] But it ignites and is now on fire.
[3717.0s] And it is its turn.
[3719.0s] And it throws its thread breath again.
[3724.0s] No.
[3725.0s] Yeah.
[3726.0s] No.
[3727.0s] Yeah.
[3728.0s] So I need a dexterity saving throw from Nularaaaa, Thea, and Grancis.
[3736.0s] 15.
[3738.0s] Six.
[3739.0s] Okay.
[3742.0s] Oh, I hate that sound.
[3743.0s] So many dice.
[3745.0s] I really wish I could lie.
[3748.0s] So Nularaaaa, Thea, and Grancis.
[3752.0s] 26.
[3754.0s] Guys.
[3755.0s] Bludgeoning damage.
[3757.0s] With a 15?
[3759.0s] Damn, son.
[3761.0s] Holy shit.
[3762.0s] Yeah, you gotta beat an 18.
[3764.0s] Damn.
[3765.0s] Sorry, how many?
[3766.0s] A million?
[3767.0s] A million two?
[3768.0s] What'd you say?
[3769.0s] 26.
[3770.0s] 26.
[3771.0s] Million two.
[3772.0s] Pretty close.
[3773.0s] Metric fuckton.
[3774.0s] Does Thea still have that mass cure-all or whatever it is?
[3779.0s] Uh-huh.
[3780.0s] Just have to make it to my turn.
[3782.0s] Nularaaaa, you are up.
[3783.0s] The adult sockpuppet dragon is...
[3785.0s] Stop calling it an adult.
[3787.0s] Can't you just call it a socky?
[3789.0s] Not socky.
[3790.0s] Thank you.
[3791.0s] Socky is on fire, frayed at the edges.
[3796.0s] There is one dust bunny still kicking you, but just keep that in mind.
[3801.0s] But it is...
[3803.0s] That's the state it's in.
[3805.0s] You no longer feel like you need to cover yourself in mud, but you...
[3809.0s] Yeah, you saved from frightened.
[3811.0s] So you can do what you need to do.
[3813.0s] Great.
[3814.0s] I'm going to attack the sock monkey instead of doing nothing, which is what I've done
[3819.0s] this whole time.
[3822.0s] That is a 27 to attack.
[3825.0s] Oh my god.
[3826.0s] Yeah, you run forward and you slice into socky.
[3830.0s] Great.
[3831.0s] So that is 14 damage.
[3833.0s] Yeah, it is.
[3835.0s] Uh-huh, uh-huh.
[3836.0s] It will take this.
[3837.0s] Some of that's fire, yes?
[3839.0s] Yeah, the...
[3840.0s] What was fire?
[3841.0s] Sorry, I already picked up my dice.
[3842.0s] No, I didn't.
[3843.0s] Five of that was fire.
[3844.0s] So it takes an extra five, so 19 total.
[3848.0s] Okay, I'm going to attack it again.
[3850.0s] Yeah.
[3851.0s] That is a 22.
[3853.0s] That will hit.
[3855.0s] So four fire damage.
[3857.0s] So eight total.
[3859.0s] Then nine piercing damage.
[3860.0s] You strike into socky and it lets out a moaning dry bellow as it falls down
[3871.0s] and you slice into its body?
[3875.0s] Two?
[3876.0s] Two?
[3877.0s] And it is dead and you see Flint crawling through the threaded mess and he emerges
[3889.0s] from the hole you cut into this sock and you hear a hush among the grungs and then
[3899.0s] an enormous cheer at the end that you have defeated the sock-puppet dragon.
[3907.0s] And the gates are opened at either end of the arena and the gold grung and the
[3912.0s] orange grungs are hopping forward to come meet you.
[3916.0s] I limp in front because I'm not doing very good.
[3920.0s] I have two hit points left.
[3921.0s] I limp in front of people and I go, no touchy.
[3924.0s] No, and I wag my finger and I'm just like, mm-mm.
[3927.0s] I know they can understand that.
[3929.0s] The other dust bunnies kind of just poof out of existence.
[3934.0s] The gold grung hears you say no touchy and he's kind of shrugging and poking in
[3941.0s] your direction, shaking his finger at you like he's trying to tell you that
[3945.0s] he needs to touch somebody.
[3947.0s] I put my hand out.
[3949.0s] And he touches your hand and you can't be poisoned.
[3954.0s] I go, psych!
[3956.0s] And I push Grancis towards him.
[3959.0s] Okay, so Grancis goes towards him and he touches Grancis again and you see them
[3964.0s] talking in grung for quite a while.
[3966.0s] Which sounds like...
[3973.0s] for quite a while.
[3974.0s] It was kind of pleasant in like a unpleasant kind of way.
[3978.0s] Yeah.
[3979.0s] And he turns to you and he's like, oh guys, so they're going to let us
[3982.0s] let us go I just have to make sure that I get them back to where they came from I
[3986.6s] mean it's gonna be tough cuz originally I came with with two grungs and now
[3991.9s] there are a lot of grungs but that's for me to deal with I'll deal with that
[3995.1s] on a later date anyways we can go we can go they're gonna lead us out it's
[3999.9s] gonna be fine good I guess thanks good job for getting us into this yeah
[4006.9s] I need a nap Thea's thoroughly cranky her high's worn off she didn't get to have
[4014.9s] mashed potatoes you did have mashed potatoes that's why we're in this
[4018.8s] pretty it's a powerful spell so they lead you out and you get back into the
[4027.2s] living area and you see the grungs kind of just surrounding Donnie every
[4033.1s] now and again one of them pokes him so that he can't really do anything and
[4041.9s] he's like ah guys we shouldn't fight these frogs anymore ever always
[4047.0s] Grancis runs over to his book and he's like I need a hand flipping the pages
[4050.7s] somebody help me flip flip flip the pages somebody okay yep so you guys go
[4056.4s] over and flip through this big dusty book and he gets to the page that he
[4060.9s] needs and he starts whispering and he casts enlarge on everybody it was
[4076.1s] slightly lying king slightly Jewish I like it yeah it's good and everybody
[4082.3s] grows back to their normal size yeah except the grunts because there's a
[4086.1s] lot of grungs he's like I'll deal with the grungs at a later time I
[4090.1s] promise grungs if you can hear me down there and they you see them all it's
[4095.5s] like I'm the bird and walk like a bunch of like fleas kind of just
[4099.7s] running across the floor and they get back into the wall yeah and flip them
[4104.1s] off as they all run uh I made I made some pie no thank you mm-hmm
[4111.3s] oh I look at them and I go drinks in my room sounds good so you guys
[4118.0s] I'll lead out Disa's going with you she doesn't talk very much apparently
[4123.6s] apparently not once not once sorry Disa nobody engaged her so we had our own
[4130.3s] shit going on it has been an unsettling meal she also took a pretty
[4134.7s] good beating at the hands of the sock she did get like blind dated onto well
[4142.2s] I guess not blind dated but she came to a setup Christmas dinner Roger Lodge
[4147.4s] could have been there like was this like old-school cat fishing I'm like
[4151.5s] no you should you should totally come meet my friend there and then yeah and
[4157.8s] then get kidnapped by tiny frogs where where the guy I set you up with
[4162.4s] doesn't talk to you the entire time like kidnapped by tiny frogs yeah so
[4167.7s] she kind of follows you and she's like you know what I'm I think I'm
[4172.3s] gonna go I think I'm gonna go Disa I'm so sorry yeah you guys get into some
[4178.2s] weird shit there's a reason why they call us the I'm hoping one time it's
[4189.5s] just gonna really come naturally like love it yeah you're trying you're
[4195.1s] trying for us to just volunteer something I like that you keep going
[4198.8s] for it yeah you know next time you're in maybe just stop by it stop by the
[4205.9s] store I think my dad wanted you to check into some things anyways I'll
[4209.8s] like catch up with you guys another time and she hobbles out oh man she
[4215.7s] hobbles now yeah but you guys go get drinks in in Thea's room it's a
[4224.0s] fucking frogs my right I think we got a ditch Grancis guys like you're with me
[4231.8s] right I don't know his his his cool songs when he's casting spells are
[4236.9s] pretty great I can can I cast a spell if we're not in like combat yeah
[4247.1s] anyone else hurting oh yeah yeah I'm gonna cast I'm gonna cast mask your
[4256.0s] wounds and or no I shouldn't do that we can just rest in my room you're all
[4260.9s] just chilling we're just gonna let's just say I mask your wounds cuz I'm a
[4265.3s] badass so we can all feel a little better and have less of a hangover
[4268.3s] later even though I know we're having a long rest and that and I'm gonna
[4272.5s] get that spell slot back anyway so why don't I just take you know I like this
[4278.4s] a mask your wounds to prevent hangover why don't I just take some
[4285.9s] people say it's a glass of water before you go to bed but no it's a
[4289.1s] mask your wounds spell it's certainly a mask your wounds I was just gonna
[4292.3s] take oh my god I can't think of the word I don't know what you're
[4296.8s] talking about not responsibility like I'm gonna take Carla you're sober come
[4304.4s] on now I don't even know where you're going with what you're saying though
[4307.2s] my like when you when you're like I totally did that like that was all me
[4312.2s] like ownership ownership no no ownership like but you're proud of it like
[4317.6s] you're like that was me this is the episode where they tried to figure out
[4324.1s] the word for oh my god you guys there's a word for it this is gonna drive me
[4333.1s] crazy anyway so just carry on with this
[4335.8s] grants us talk fuck grants us let's ditch him like I mean sure he is an
[4341.1s] airship well maybe we can still get one more ride with them because he's
[4344.0s] got a head to take those little cute froggy dudes back right where they
[4347.2s] came from yeah but where is he going and where do we need to go probably
[4351.3s] not something we're gonna solve having drinks on Christmas night well no and I
[4355.5s] mean we have that meeting yeah I was just trying to leave us an opening for
[4358.9s] a faster overland travel instead of having to go and oh no fair enough so
[4363.3s] adventures on our next trip somewhere fair oh I think this could be
[4367.6s] leverage hey remember that time you shrunk us and those frogs kidnapped
[4371.9s] us listen we need to go into the spooky mountains I don't I don't know
[4376.1s] any of the landscape around us right now you're in a major metropolis city
[4383.7s] no I know that like no but like if we had to go somewhere like we went to
[4390.0s] like a snowy place check your guys quest log you guys have a place you need
[4395.0s] to go anyways yeah you can definitely use that as leverage so you guys have
[4398.7s] drinks and you jovially talk about all your winter solstice endeavors here
[4403.9s] with Grancis and you rest you feel good after your rest much better than being
[4409.1s] beaten the shit out of by a sock so the next day you are called upon by
[4416.9s] Leosin and he leads you to where the council is having their their
[4423.0s] meeting and he says guys I just warn you things are a little things are a
[4427.9s] little tough right now nobody's getting along and you're gonna walk
[4430.7s] into something that's a little hairy just be prepared to to talk it out and
[4437.5s] justify things that have happened and will happen and know that you know
[4443.3s] that you're behind us that we know that we have support there you have
[4447.5s] support from from all those that matter long story short there's been
[4452.7s] a death an apparent suicide that some people believe may have been a murder
[4458.5s] who was murdered one of the delegates on the council for the Harpers how is
[4464.8s] it done it appears to be a suicide but there are clues that maybe lead to the
[4472.8s] fact that it might not have been so cut and dry great so it's like CSI
[4478.5s] Miami now who's gonna whip off their sunglasses somebody say something witty
[4482.0s] they suspect that maybe one of the centerem the the black network yes you
[4489.6s] know who they are go back to episode 2 might have been in on it that's all
[4494.5s] the information we have right now and he opens the door and you see the
[4499.2s] entire council chamber barking and yelling at each other screaming across
[4504.5s] the room it's mayhem and chaos and you look to the head of the table
[4509.5s] where the last time you were here you saw Lord Neverember you see lady Laryl
[4514.7s] Silverhand and she is sitting at the head of the table and Lord Neverember
[4518.3s] is not there
[4534.7s] music in today's episode was by Kavin McLeod of in Competech dot film
[4538.9s] music.io you know what I'm saying burn cool surely yeah I like that I was
[4550.9s] gonna make fun of Russ for his like super dated reference and somehow Amy
[4554.3s] made an even more dated reference it was pretty impressive we're we're me
[4561.9s] who are made for you are it's so sweet oh you don't like talking to
[4567.0s] yourself I take it back I push Flint toward it you push Grantz's towards it
[4571.5s] it's fine you don't make hot toddy talk I can do whatever you want okay who
[4578.1s] wants to be touched by a grung Dumbgeons and Dragons is a dumb dragons
[4584.5s] production